I Used to Ask for Referrals by Saying…

I used to ask for referrals by saying: ‘I build my business by referral; do you know of anyone I could help?’”

Reflected Steve, a wealth advisor to the affluent based in Houston.

He was already growing to be a top advisor at his global wealth management firm. In other words, his lack of referrals had nothing to do with his expertise, effort, or service.

When I first met Steve, he wasn’t afraid to ask for introductions, but he was really frustrated that he was doing his best to service his clients and develop top-notch center of influence relationships but was not getting many referrals. He had almost given up on asking because it wasn’t working for him.

There were two sticking points:

“I would often get a ‘let me think about that.'”

“I also would get referrals that never materialized into meetings.”

Here’s what he changed:

He started making targeted asks:

✅ A name

✅ A company

✅ A title

✅ An opportunity that excited him

Not "anyone I can help." Not "anyone you work with."

He started asking focused questions around follow up:

✅ “How would you be most comfortable introducing us?”

✅ “Would it be easier if I emailed you a couple of things to share with your two clients thinking about selling their business?”

✅ “When should I get back to you to see if they’re interested?”

He committed to making 5 referral asks per week – and he was good for his word (spoiler alert: most people are not).

His asks went from wary (weak energy) to increasingly expectant that people would want to help (confident energy) because now he had a strategy about asking. He wasn’t shooting in the dark.

What was the result for Steve?

“With Matt’s help, I adopted a method to reduce the hurdles for consistently asking for referrals. Matt helped me realize that by not asking for referrals consistently, I may have unintentionally limited the number of people I could help. My goal has always been to provide value and make a difference, and I learned that inviting more people into that experience is one of the best ways to do that. Matt is the first guy I call when I need to recharge and the last guy I would refer to my competitors.”

The moral of the story is that the success of a winning referral strategy for Stephen Lewis was not an accident – and it doesn't have to be for you either.

Want to refine your referral energy? Let’s connect.